BITCH, BITCH BITCH!!!!!!! (And other relative thoughts…)

I listen to a lot of talk radio, it keeps me up to date on the REAL National news, politics, sports and local crap. But I am now about to my breaking point. “What could that be?” you ask yourself. FUCKING PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENTS (P.S.A.s)!!!!!!!! With two in particular: child car seats and “Buzzed driving is drunk driving.”
Your childs car seat: The jist of it is the following “if your child is in the wrong sized car seat you are the parental equivalent of a 50/50 mix of Hitler and Jeffery Dahmer!” So let’s recap, if little Billie had a growth spurt and is now 1/2 inch to tall and 3 lbs to heavy for the old seat, you are a fucking douche nozzle that should be sterilized and sent to a reeducation camp! For the record I was sent home in my Mom’s lap, with no seatbelt, and she had a cigarette in her mouth AND A METAL DASHBOARD…..AND I’M STILL FUCKING ALIVE!!!!!! This goes back to the current craze of fucking child worship in this country, and it’s WRONG! For a majority of your kids existence until adulthood your child is an annoying tick on you and society and this constant coddling is what is leading them into your basement at the age of 27 after being called “special” their whole damn lives and after being sent into the real world where results, not feelings, is all that matters, they run back home to feel “special” again! “I don’t know why they won’t hire you Sally, after all it only took you six years to get that degree in women’s studies/black history/history/literature/art history/religious studies/theatre/philosophy/creative writing/ (insert your worthless degree here).” And if any of this has offended you, fuck off and get off my porch, I already tipped you for the pizza!! Oh, and while I am on a roll, if you are one of these parents that takes your booger eaters to an ethnic restaurant and lets the little fucker order chicken nuggets because “That’s all little Bobby will eat” punch yourself in the cock/cunt because you are a part of the fucking problem. You are catering to this already spoiled little fuck and teaching them that they will always get their way from a young age on, then you are going to send them out into the real world and they will run into someone like me and I WILL make them cry.
Buzzed driving is drunk driving: I am in no way advocating getting shit faced and driving.NO NO NO! But I am sick of this bullshit that having a beer with your lunch now makes you the equivalent of a 16 year old girl, on a cell phone, radio cranked and driving Mommy’s Suburban!!!! This touchy-feely overprotective nanny State needs to fucking stop!! On my way to Sams today, this stupid bitch attempted to change lanes while in an intersection (look it up ladies, it’s a no no. Or ask a man.) while talking on a cell phone to boot. To make matters worse, I was next to her! Not in the blind spot, NEXT TO HER!!!! Now I admit, a jacked up, white, 4×4 F 150 is a very elusive little critter but this stupid bitch is a menace to all of us, not the person who has two beers after work to unwind so he can go home and not get into a domestic incident. And if any of you ladies are offended by my rant, eat me and change your own oil/tire/coolant/etc. Some stereotypes exist for a valid reason, this is one. I have a CDL (ask a man) class B and motorcycle licence with over a million miles of driving experience so please accept my expert testimony. If you don’t believe me, ask any other commercial driver.
I am the Burgernazi and I approve this message. More to come and if you like the blog, come in and tell me.

Written by

No Comments Yet.

Leave a Comment