The official platform for the 2016 write in President, The Burgernazi!

As the midterms are over I throw my hat in the ring for the 2016 Presidential election. The following will be the outline of my platform and policy statement. As usual, this is NSFW and should make a few asshats a little butthurt.
DOMESTIC POLICIES: Let’s start with the welfare state by implementing some common sense reforms; drug testing. Work or job training requirement. Mandatory sterilization after two tricycle motors are downloaded. Separate stores for food stamps. Food stamp are only good for canned goods, rice, beans and powdered milk. No soda, meat, candy bars or frozen food. Sound a little harsh, you say? Well if you want a more diverse menu get a FUCKING JOB! The system is to help you survive not thrive on the tax payer’s dime.
Tax’s: Fair Tax. Do your research but trust me, it’s a real answer.
Politically “Correct” language: All citizens will be required by law to have a sock filled with quarters to smack any asshole that is P.C. without any criminal or civil punishment. Call yourself African American yet you were born in the United States? Smack! Ernie Ells, the white golfer from South Africa is an African American, you are not. Hearing impaired? Smack! Your fucking deaf. The handy capable? Smack! Your are a cripple. Homeless? Smack! Your a fucking bum. Eating disorder? Smack! Your a stupid bitch that likes to overeat then jam fingers down your throat when a cock isn’t in it. Undocumented worker? Smack! Your an illegal alien, because you broke the law three times: Coming here, staying here and working here is a total of three federal crimes and therefor ILLEGAL. I could go on for days on this issue alone but please notice that there is a current word in the English language that has worked for a VERY LONG TIME!
Social issues: I like most citizens don’t care who or what you are sticking your dick/fist/dildo in as long as it’s consensual just SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT IT AND STOP TRYING TO SHOVE IT DOWN OUR THROATS!!!! And stop with the fucking parades as all you are doing is fucking up the flow of traffic. Oh, you want to get married? Fine but no divorce. That should slow down demand.
Foreign Policy: Immediate withdrawal and defunding from the United Nations and an accompanied eviction notice from New York. It is an anti American organization and I hate them and they stank! The building can be used to house wounded and homeless veterans not that collection of jizz jars. Speaking of the military, the lowest ranking member of the military will make more than ANY welfare tick. And I will bring back the Secretary of WAR! Fuck this defense shit, the military has two jobs; kill people and break things! If you want defense buy a gun and own a dog. I could rant for days but you get the point. I am the Burgernazi and I approve this message.

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